Play to Win

I was fortunate to begin my career with a company that really lived into the mantra, “work hard, play hard.” We used employee meetings to celebrate accomplishments, we threw parties to mark successful projects, invited family to annual picnics and frequent open houses, and encouraged people to decorate for nearly every holiday – with Halloween as a peak over-the-top party day.

Did productivity suffer? Sometimes…but stay with me for a moment. We always received more than we lost, because play time built more capacity for the Real Work of the organization.

The leaders who were my role models at the time realized something important: commitment is a choice. When you regularly invite people into fun and celebration – a relatively easy choice for most – you create a space for them to flex their commitment “muscles.”

• When the focus later turns to hard work, challenging projects, and disruptive change, people find it easier to say Yes because their Yes “muscle” is fairly strong and tuned in to the organization.
• When you ask people to work in teams, it’s no big deal because they are so used to working together from building sets for Halloween or creating a strategy to win the lunch time games tournament.
• When you need to tap the creativity of your workforce, they are already skilled at generating wild ideas from when they were working on the last Pajamas Day and making tough budget decisions for the employee activities committee.

If you’re a smart leader, you will create the space for Play and fun in the workplace, with an eye toward using play to nurture the skills that are useful elsewhere in the business: team work, conversation, creativity, decision-making, collaborating across levels and organizational boundaries… and commitment.

Play is not a waste or expense. It is an investment with a huge ROI.

Remember, Leadership is not about a title: Anyone can be a leader who allows people to bring their whole self to work and have fun on the job while building the skills to win.

Play Like a Kid

I was recruited to deliver the keynote presentation at a regional Human Resources conference in Tampa. My dear wife suggested that I take an extra day to enjoy the sunshine.

What?! No way! I’m too busy. I have backlog. I… I’m burned out. So after the conference ended I drove to Orlando, had dinner with a former client, then spent the next day with Harry Potter at Universal Studios.

I strapped myself into a roller coaster painted like a dragon and screamed. I dropped ten stories on the Fear Fall, flew over a Quidditch field on an enchanted bench, narrowly escaped from a T-rex, and got soaking wet – on
purpose!

I watched kids at play and reveled in their joy. I found a quiet spot in the sun and did yoga midday. Then I stood in the middle of a Truffula forest in awe of the creative spirit that brought Dr Suess’ whimsy to life.

It was just 24 hours, but what a difference. My tank refilled, simply because I stepped away from the grind.

If it has been more than six months since you took a vacation, stop wondering why you are stressed. I can tell you why – you need a break!

Go somewhere and play like a kid. I promise you’ll feel happier.

Are You Serious About Play?

When I ask any audience about the value of Happiness, they quickly create a long list of positive outcomes. Among these are better relationships and health, lower stress, and higher
productivity and creativity.

What if I told you there was something that could give you all the above PLUS make you more flexible and adaptable? And make your brain work better?

You knew how to do it when you were younger, but you forgot. It’s called Play.

Play Builds Skills For Life

Play is activity that has no real purpose. It is unstructured, unsupervised, and unscored. You do it just because it’s fun, and time passes quickly when you get engaged. And just as tossing around a ball builds skills that later show up in a real game, so too Play builds skills that later show up in Real Life.

Here are six ideas to Play more:

1. Laugh. It releases feel-good chemicals (endorphins), suppresses stress hormones, and
   strengthens your immune system.
2. Do something with your hands (no keyboard or phone). Painting, writing, manual work,
   or even crafting can induce a state of flow.
3. Get Down. Chairs are for adults. Whether you read a book, watch TV, work on your iPad, or
   eat dinner, it will feel more fun when you sit on the floor to do it. Bonus points if you do it with
   a dog, cat, or small child.
4. Pull out a board game or jigsaw puzzle. Even if you don’t finish, the conversation builds
   relationships and invites storytelling.
5. Move your body. Varying positions improves blood flow to your brain and improves cardiovascular health, while movement releases stress and generates more of those endorphins!
6. Get Creative. Many a parent has been disappointed when they offer a newly assembled toy
   but the child plays with the box. Play is less about stimulation than it is about imagination. Provoke yours. Dress up, dress down, try a new food, join a group, or pick up that karaoke microphone.

No one’s keeping score – it’s just Play!

P.S. See below for proof that when it comes to Play, I practice what I teach.

How Do You Keep Your Edge as a Coach?

Act Happy Week, Day 5: Say Thank You

The focus of Act Happy Week is to educate the public about
 purposeful actions you can take to create chemical shifts in your
 body that drive Positive Emotions. Here is today's exercise:

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DAY 5: SAY THANK YOU
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The story is told of an old woman sitting on a park bench. She felt old and alone and useless, and thought of suicide. After awhile, a young man came and sat on the other end of the bench. For a time they fed the birds together. When the young man went to leave, he thanked her for a lovely afternoon. The old woman realized that she did, in fact, matter to others. She went home determined to push forward.

Photo Credit: Patrick Hoesly via Compfight

When you express gratitude, you experience the pleasure of giving a gift to another human being and the excitement of watching them open it and enjoy it.

Send a Thank You Note. For anything. For a favor, for a gift, or just for being in your life.

Offer appreciation to someone who helped you in the past week. Call them or go over to their desk and do this before the end of the day. YOU will benefit from the experience as much or more than than they will!

Write down what you are grateful for. Create a Gratitude List. Writing it down stimulates different chemistry in the body versus just thinking it.

Speak it. Say “thank you” out loud as often as you notice others. Say Thank You to your server each time they visit your table. Say Thank You to the clerk who serves you and the bagger who handles your groceries. And yes, even say “Thank You for the Offer” to the telemarketer who interrupts your dinner (it’s OK to hang up… just respect them as you do).

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In the Workplace

Take five minutes daily to generate three appreciative conversations with team members. Offer thanks for something very specific that you saw them do this week.

Remember, Leadership is not about a title – anyone can be a leader who makes others feel loved and appreciated for their contributions.

Act Happy Week, Day 4: Fake It to Feel It

 The focus of Act Happy Week is to educate the public about
 purposeful actions you can take to create chemical shifts in your
 body that drive Positive Emotions. Here is today's exercise:

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DAY 4: FAKE IT TO FEEL IT
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Every emotion you live in corresponds to different body postures, breathing, and energy. If you want to live in a different mood or emotion start with your body – thus reversing from mind-body to a Body-Mind connection: a different body will support different emotional responses, which will in turn affect your brain chemistry and thoughts.

Act like a different mood. Every mood comes from a different body posture. Stand in front of a mirror and notice the way your body looks when you are worried, fearful, sad, or frustrated.

Shift yourself to embody what you want more of, e.g. calm, confidence, happiness, or patience. Straighten up, open up, uncurl, unfold, or relax your body/posture. Remember to shift your facial expression to match the mood you want.

Breathe deeply. Emotions related to fear, sadness, or anger pull the breath higher into the chest or throat, whereas connecting emotions like happiness and love drop the breath. You can stimulate more positive emotional energy when you breathe in to your lower belly – slow, deep, and calm.

Notice how you feel in different postures. Remember, different positions may feel unfamiliar at first. Practice that adjusted posture multiple times daily.

If you are unsure of what mood you are putting out, do this exercise with a friend who can help you “re-sculpt” your body, facial expression, and breathing.

Fake it till you really “get it” in your body. Then you can access it when you need it.

Stand Tall, Breathe Deeply, Smile Often.

 Photo Credit: danorbit. via Compfight

Act Happy Week, Day 3: Reach Out and Touch Someone

The focus of Act Happy Week is to educate the public about
 purposeful actions you can take to create chemical shifts in your
 body that drive Positive Emotions. Here is today's exercise:

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DAY 3: REACH OUT AND TOUCH SOMEONE
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Conversation is one of the most human and affirmative things you can do. Think about it – the worst punishment in our world is solitary confinement – the elimination of conversation. When you engage with others with positive intent, you feed into a positive emotional space for both of you.

Perform acts of kindness. Liberty Mutual Insurance runs commercials in which a person performs a small act of kindness for another… and a person who witnesses that does a favor for someone else, and so on. The commercial serves as a powerful reminder that even the smallest actions done out of good intentions can have a ripple effect in the world. Plus, you feel better about yourself when you reach out to others!

Send a note to a friend. For no reason. Hand write, “I was thinking of you and decided to send you a smile.” That simple.

Call/visit someone who is lonely. When you reach out to someone who is alone, all you need to do is be with them. Listen, exchange stories, read aloud, just be present. You create the gift of a memory to savor.

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A word about Chocolate

Act Happy Week coincides with American Chocolate week, a celebration of chocolate brands made in the USA. Chocolate contains chemical compounds that cause a positive emotional affect – that’s why happiness and chocolate mix well!

What’s your favorite chocolate?

• Perhaps it’s Ghiradelli or TCHO, made in San Francisco?
• Socially responsible chocolate, like Endangered Species from Indianapolis?
• Big Old Chocolate like Mars or Hersheys?
• Or maybe locavore chocolate – in Cleveland that might be Malley’s or the positively divine Lilly’s in Tremont.

Whatever your taste, give a shout out today to a chocolate made in America!

Act Happy Week, Day 2: Tell a Positive Story

The focus of Act Happy Week is to educate the public about
 purposeful actions you can take to create chemical shifts in your
 body that drive Positive Emotions. Here is today's exercise:

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DAY 2: TELL A POSITIVE STORY; SAVOR THE MOMENT
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Savoring is the deliberate act of enjoying something – paying attention to the experience, in the moment. When you bring yourself fully present, you temporarily reduce the stress of worry about past/future. Your breathing slows, which calms your body and creates a positive state.

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Tips for Savoring

Share: Tell others your “story” as a way to relive an experience. Share a fun story from the past weekend, or describe that fabulous new recipe you tried last week. Post it on Facebook (with pictures!)

Self Appreciation: Give yourself permission for POSITIVE self-talk. Say to yourself, “I am so proud of you. I think you are awesome!” Give yourself a high-five for something you accomplished. Write the story in your journal.

Absorption: Immerse yourself totally in something; pay attention to sensations you experience. Eat popcorn one kernel at a time, noticing the sweet/salt taste on your tongue. Let that chocolate melt slooooowly in your mouth (no chewing!). Watch a movie and flow with the film as though you were in it yourself. Watch ducks on a pond. Enjoy sunshine on your face.

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In the Workplace

Good News: Start your meetings this week by going around the room and asking each person to share a piece of Good News. It can be personal or professional. Watch the mood shift (and notice how productivity in the meeting changes!).

Remember: Leadership is not about a title – anyone can be a leader who engages others in positive emotional moments.

Act Happy Week, Day 1: Smile on Purpose

The focus of Act Happy Week is to educate the public about
 purposeful actions you can take to create chemical shifts in your
 body that drive Positive Emotions. Here is today's exercise:

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DAY 1: SMILE ON PURPOSE
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Smiling is one of the most primal of human interactions. A baby’s
smile is one of their first voluntary forms of communication – and
can you even imagine not smiling back at a smiling baby?

Smiling initiates a complex shift of muscles, breath, and body
chemistry (you release endorphins!) that creates a more positive
mood. Plus, what you put out, others mirror back to you, feeding an
increasingly positive emotional space.

When you smile on purpose, it will affect all your interactions,
whether in a meeting, speaking with a customer, or just walking
down the hallway.

So today, Smile on Purpose. Happiness is not a spectator sport.

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In the Workplace

A smile is the universal sign that one is experiencing a good
feeling. So smiling in the workplace can tell us much about mood
and morale.

The leader who makes eye contact and carries a genuine smile as
they move through the workspace is perceived as more trustworthy
and approachable. People who work in such an environment feel more
engaged. It’s more complex than JUST that, of course, yet it’s also
that simple.

Remember: Leadership is not about a title – anyone can be a leader
when they focus on helping others succeed by providing a positive
influence!

Why didn’t we listen to Henry Ford?

Last week, I delivered a program on leadership that spoke to the nature of leadership presence, our impact on others, and the importance of creating a positive climate in which others can apply their strengths and excel.

Sidebar conversations emerged about the “reality” that emotions are neither acknowledged nor respected in the workplace, and the only thing that gets rewarded or appreciated is the application of intellectual skills. People are neither trained in interpersonal skills nor rewarded for having them in many circumstances. There is often a complete disconnect between the reality that people are what make the organization successful and the context that the business exists only to create profits for stakeholders.

The following day I came across a quote attributed to Henry Ford — the man who created the assembly line, an invention that nearly led to the extinction of the human spirit in the organization.  I have a sense that was not his intent as I read the following:

“The smallest indivisible reality is, to my mind, intelligent and is waiting there to be used by human spirits if we reach out and call them in. We rush too much with the nervous hands and worried minds. We are impatient for results. What we need…. is reinforcement of the soul by the invisible power waiting to be used. I know there are reservoirs of spiritual strength from which we human beings thoughtlessly cut ourselves off…. I believe we shall someday be able to know enough about the source of power, and the realm of the spirit to create something ourselves…. I firmly believe that mankind was once wiser about spiritual things than we are today. What we now only believe, they knew.”
~~ Henry Ford, Detroit News, February 7, 1926.

Emphasis at the end is mine.  ”what we now only believe, they knew.”  So, in the early days of the modern age, we had a leader who sensed that disconnection between spirit & soul versus the business world.  He called for a reinforcement of the soul and reconnection to spiritual strength.

Why didn’t we listen to Henry Ford?

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