Pay Attention to Your Limitations

“Interestingly, Koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long. In a pond Koi can reach lengths of eighteen inches. Amazingly, when placed in a lake, Koi can grow to three feet long. The metaphor is obvious. You are limited by how you see the world.” — Vince Poscente

Koi, of course, are more often known as the common goldfish.  I’ve seen the above phenomenon play out when we’ve taken goldfish won at a carnival from a bowl on a shelf and moved them to our neighbor’s pond.

The funny thing about this self-limiting growth is that the fish is completely unaware of their environmental constraints.  They simply grow into what ever is available to them.  In a like manner, human beings grow into the space that’s available to them, often without being aware of the constraints others have placed on them.  We grow up to meet the expectations that others — and ourselves — have of us.

A big difference between humans and fish, of course, is that the fish will never really be aware — whereas the human has the capacity to notice their environment and intentionally choose to change it.

Do you choose to live your life in a small or big way?  And if you’re not happy with where you are, what are you doing about it?

In happiness, J

Happiness is Eating Healthy!

Since I completed a three-week detox just over a year ago, I’m much more mindful of the food that I eat.  I learned then, and have reinforced many times since, that I am what I eat — when I eat junk, I feel like crap; when I eat good food, everything’s easier in my life, including getting up with a positive attitude.

My wife - while still cherishing the occasional pork chop or hamburger - has essentially adopted my eating habits, and we’ve recently gone as long as four weeks without going to a grocery store.  How do we accomplish that feat?  Well, we find everything we need at a local produce market.

I read some articles recently that used several new terms to describe the way I’ve been eating for the past fifteen months:

• One-ingredient foods
• The Label-free diet
• The outer circle diet

These all describe the same concept:  Choose only foods at the grocery store that have 1 ingredient (this means that eggs, fruits, vegetables, meats/fish (from healthy animals raised correctly), nuts, seeds, and other 1-ingredient foods should comprise almost your entire diet (except for occasional cheat meals — and dark chocolate).

It’s also called the Label-Free diet because you only eat foods that do not require an FDA nutritional label (see above — what’s in eggs? Eggs!  What’s in a peach? Peach!  no label required).

And it’s also called the Outer Circle diet because you can do all your shopping at a typical grocery store by starting in the produce section (almost always in front corner of store) then steer a circle around the outer wall of the store — meats, dairy, etc.  In the middle of the store are all the processed foods with extensive labeling that you must read to even know what you are eating.

Obviously there are exceptions to the above, and there are foods you can buy with more than 1 ingredient still qualify, e.g. guacamole and hummus being two examples of foods made from several 1-ingredient foods and no additives/fats/sugars.  And oatmeal (ingredients: oats) is still in the cereal aisle.

I’ve written before about how my diet — which dramatically reduced my intake of caffeine, sugars, and glutens — has totally eliminated my afternoon sleepiness, the mood swings I used to experience from the sugar buzz/crash cycle, and the frequent heartburn that made me very crabby and unable to concentrate.

This shift has also dramatically heightened my awareness of how my body and emotions respond when I stray too far from what’s good for my body — I get shaky, dopey, irritable, tense, uncomfortable, distracted, and sometimes even downright mean when I eat poorly!

This may be difficult for many people whose bodies are addicted to processed foods… but give it a try for a week.  when you next shop for groceries, try to make sure that you only put in to your cart 1-ingredient/no-label foods.

I’m willing to bet you’ll feel better for that next week!  And a BODY that feels better has more opportunity to experience happiness.

Happiness is Eating Healthy!

Come To Work Happy

A reader from Singapore sent me this cartoon.  Happiness in the workplace is a global concern.  In an era of cost-cutting and bad news, this presents a clever, low-cost strategy for improving morale **

**Funny, yes?  The thing is, studies have shown that even FAKE SMILES can have an impact on mood.  That stems in part from the ‘fake it till you make it’ reality of the Mind-Body connection — when we act a part long enough, we eventually grow into the emotion, so smiling when you don’t feel it will, after a few minutes, lift your spirits a bit because you emotion races to match what you’re doing w/ your body.

The other reason why the Fake Smile exercise works is that other people are more likely to smile back at you when you wear a smile. Because we humans are emotionally contagious, others’ good feelings rub off on you, lightening your own mood a bit.  Cool, huh?!

A Smile really is a powerful weapon in the fight against negativity at work!

Happiness is Accepting Life as it comes

My mother turned 75 last month.  She’s in pretty good health for an old lady who raised eight kids and has 19 grandchildren.  My dad passed away 23 years ago, and Mom turned out to be quite the survivor — she went to work for Kelly Girls as a permatemp for many years, finished raising my younger siblings, and has retained her independence.

Several years ago vision problems arose, and the doctors diagnosed macular degeneration — slowly but surely she is losing her eyesight.  Still, with a huge magnifying glass and bright light she continued to read voraciously.  And as long as she still had that car in her garage, she could still manage her own life — as long as she only drove on sunny days, to destinations she already knew.

So she kept the car — carrying the insurance and maintenance costs on her limited budget, because of what the car stood for.  This disease is progressive, however, and despite all treatments, Mom recently came to terms with the fact that she is a danger to self and others on the road.  The car had to go.

On a beautiful sunny day last week she took the car out for one last trip to her hairdresser.  When she returned, she turned the keys over to Brandon, a great guy who’s been dating my niece, Elizabeth.  Brandon needed a new car, and who can pass up a deal like this one — the car is ten years old, only has 20,000 miles on it, and was (literally!) only driven by a little old lady to the local mall, church on Sundays… and her hairdresser.

Grandma Mary Ann has cheerfully moved on to the next phase of her life — a little more dependent on others, yet still independent… and always still Smilin’!

P.S.  She does NOT color her hair. I hope I still have that much dark hair on my head 22 years from now!