Down Time is Productive Time

Have you ever watched an auto race? Cars race around the track and race around the track at high speeds, and occasionally pull into the Pit where their Pit Crew come screaming into action.  The car is jacked up on hydraulic lifts and instantly the crew swarm the car like ants on a sugar cookie.  For a few minutes there is a blinding, high-speed whirlwind of non-stop activity as drills whir, bolts come off, tires are replaced, fluids are renewed, everything is wiped and tightened and checked and watered.

That level of intensity is how many organizations expect their teams to operate — at high speed, with high efficiency, attending to a million details per minute, just like that pit crew.

What some organizations or leaders forget, however, is that after the pit crew has done their high-speed work, the car pulls out and goes back onto the track, and the pit crew gets to take a breath. And after they recover, they move into preparation mode for the next time their driver has to pull off for servicing.

What would happen if a pit crew had to be constantly ON, operating at their highest level of speed and intensity ALL the time?  They’d burn out.  There’d be mistakes.  Things would be missed.  There would be accidents.

Fact is, the down time IS productive time. The down time is when the pit crew analyzes their performance under pressure.  It’s when they take time to appreciate a job well done and identify ways they can improve their output the next time.  It’s part of the cycle, the yin/yang of work:  preparation, then performance.  There is a time for each

It’s the same for you.

Do you expect yourself to be on and up and fast and perfect and creative ALL THE TIME?! And do you beat yourself up when you’re not?  Give it a rest!  You are ONLY human, my friend.  You are programmed to operate best when you take periods of rest between your intensity sessions.

Organizations that don’t know how to give renewal time to their people are failing their teams. They are probably ending up with a workforce that is constantly on the edge of burnout.

Individuals that don’t take time to renew end up in the same place – burned out, anxious, unhappy.

So take a breath! Relax every so often.  Give your own system — or your team — a chance to balance out performance with preparation and renewal.  It’s the cycle of life, it’s the cycle of work.

Are You Caught In An Emotional Web?

Do you ever feel like you’re “stuck” in a situation or mindset?

When you get stuck it is often because you are off balance in one of the five domains in which you exist as a human being: Intellectual, Emotional, Physical, Spiritual, or Interpersonal.

Intellectual - Human beings are the only species on the planet that can Time Travel. How often do you spend time re-living / fretting / obsessing / savoring about your Past? And how much time do you spend worrying / dreaming / fantasizing / creating your Future? If you are stuck in a story about another time, you may find it quite challenging to live, work, and make decisions in the Present.

Emotional - When you get stuck it’s usually because the story you’re telling yourself about the Past/Future or Present evokes a strong emotion. You are always in some emotional state, of course, but the stronger the emotion, the farther you are from the place of rational calm where decisions are easier.

Think of your emotions as being spread out in a web around you (see figure). Each emotional “family” exists on a strand of intensity. As a very simple example, on the Anger strand Irritation is a fairly mild emotion. Frustration is a notch higher, Anger more intense, and at Rage one can spiral totally out of control. The Fear strand might start with low-level worry, escalating to the unreasoning state of Panic. The farther one moves from the center, the more intense the experience – and the more difficult it can be to make rational decisions. Yes, this is true even of the more positive emotions, as you can see from the Love strand.

Think of a spider and their web. Notice spiders always sit in the center of their web. Why? Because that is the strongest place. The farther out on a strand they go, the more vulnerable they become. The best path to any part of the web always runs THROUGH the center.

Physical - When you feel off balance in your body it is a literal experience, e.g. when you lean too far, sit in an awkward position, breathe very high in your body, or exceed your physical limitations (like climbing stairs or running too fast). Your intellectual story and the emotional response that goes with it can also affect your breathing and pulse rate in negative ways.

Spiritual – Imbalance in this domain occurs when you notice a break in the connection between you and the rest of the Universe. It’s not about religion; whether you are a Catholic, Muslim, agnostic, or tree-worshipper, your system craves to feel loved and legitimate in the world. When that is missing, you can feel groundless and unable to act.

Interpersonal - You get stuck around interpersonal issues when it’s about them, them, them. Most relationship problems are rooted not in the other person, but in the thought you have that “they” should change or be different. The more you hold that story (“why can’t THEY change?”) the more out of balance and stressed you feel, because you are essentially making yourself a Victim.

To Get Unstuck, Come Back To Center

A common effect across all five domains is this: the farther you are from your Center, the more likely you will feel stuck, unbalanced, disconnected, or out of control. So let’s explore the nature of Center.

Your Intellectual center is Now. When you come back from time traveling to be fully Present, you are at your most powerful.

Your Emotional center is calm, or Choice. From Calm, you can make better decisions and choose which emotional state will serve you best.

Your Physical center is your solar plexus, just below your navel. The Vitruvian Man (see illustration) demonstrates this. When you shift from autopilot into awareness of your body you ground yourself in the Here and now.

Your Spiritual center is Self-Acceptance, the place where you can say, “I am.” I am, I accept myself with no conditions. I am loved. I have legitimacy, I have the right to exist.

Your Interpersonal center is also You. In any interaction, you are 50% of the conversation… and you are only 50%. So if there’s anything going on in a relationship, what can you control? You – your story, your beliefs, and your attitude toward the other person(s).

I/It versus I/Thou

When your attitude is “I/It,” your relationship to others is transactional, where every conversation is more or less about what you can get out of it. When you hold an “I/Thou” mindset, you hold others in a place of respect that acknowledges their sacredness or legitimacy, where your conversation is, “I am legitimate and you also are legitimate and deserve respect.” An I/Thou mindset pulls you out of victimhood and into Strength. You access I/Thou when you are fully present in your body.

So these are your five centers: – Now, Calm (or Choice), Here, I am, I/Thou.

Exercise: Accessing Your Five Centers

I invite you to engage in an exercise. I want to show how in just a few seconds you can access all Five Centers simultaneously.

To begin, sit back in your seat and place your feet flat on the floor. Become aware of your breath as it enters and leaves your body. As you focus, consciously shift to breathing in and out through your nose.

Feel the rush of air as it races through your sinus cavities. Know that your sinus cavities are just below the part of brain that controls your emotions, the amygdala. From a neuro-biological perspective, when you take in a long, deep breath through your nose you send cool air across the surface of the amygdala, thus cooling it and decreasing blood flow – which automatically calms whatever emotional state you’re experiencing. (For those who do yoga, this is the Ujayi breath – Very powerful.)

Next, move your attention to where your breath goes inside your body. Consciously move your breath deeper into your body, until you can feel it coming all the way down to your physical center, your solar plexus. (To aid in this, you might place a hand on your belly just below your navel.)

Now let’s just take a long, deep breath together. Take the breath in through your nose. And notice how in this one moment, this is all you are thinking about. Notice how that deep breath evokes calm. You are fully present in your own body.

You are, in this moment, aligned in your Five Centers. Now.  Calm.  Here.  I am.  I/Thou.

Pretty cool, huh? Just from breathing…

I invite you to take one more deep breath, and remember how easy it is to pull yourself back from the rest of the universe and center yourself in Mind, Heart, Body, Spirit, Relationships. One breath: Now, calm, Here, I am, I/Thou.

Remember, you are what you repeatedly do. If this exercise resonates for you, make time every day to practice it. In time, your entire system will know what to do when you are under stress: Just breathe!

Advice for Happier Performance Appraisals

This is a busy season for Performance Appraisal (PA) discussions, and this topic’s come up with several clients recently.  Anxiety seems to be the most common emotion associated with PAs, both on the part of the receiver and the writer/manager.

A little anxiety running up to the conversation can be helpful  — it will keep you alert and engaged during all the discussions.  Once the conversation starts, however, you don’t want to be trying to speak and listen from a body of anxiety.  Your primary filter in anxiety (a low grade version of fear) is, “This person may be wanting to do me harm, so I must be vigilant.”  How can anyone be a good listener when THAT conversation is going on inside one’s head, and the body is sitting on the edge of a fight/flight/freeze response?

So I offer two pieces of advice, one for you if you are a manager/writer of the review, and one for if you are the subject of a PA (and many of you find yourself in both roles, I’m sure!).   This comes out of my personal experience — 20 years of leading over 400 performance review conversations, during which time I made my share of mistakes and learned a whole heck of a lot of great ways to create a positive conversation even when the news is difficult:

For the manager/writer

Whether you are delivering good or bad news, praise or corrective steering advice, always respect the PERSON.  You may disagree w/ their opinion; don’t be disagreeable.  You may think your assessment is superior to theirs; don’t forget to listen, hear them out, even as you choose to disagree with their assessment. In every way possible, seek to make it a a conversation/dialogue rather than a monologue.

When you find your emotions rising up (anger, anxiety, irritation) remember to sit back, take a deep breathe, and let your body settle down before you continue.  As the saying goes, “People will forget what you say but they will never forget how you made them feel.”

For the receiver of feedback

Remember that you are human, and that you are not perfect.  No, your boss is not perfect, either, but that’s not point.  The business purpose of Performance Appraisal is to assess contribution to the business and to grow capacity for the future.  It’s a business tool, not a massage.

If you arrive in a PA conversation believing that the purpose of the exercise is to feed your ego, you will be disappointed.  If, however, you arrive with an eagerness to talk about what more you can do to learn, improve, grow, and otherwise increase your value to the company, you’re far more likely to “hear” any critical feedback as a GIFT to you.  After all, if all anyone shares with you is praise, you’ll miss the opportunity to grow!

Even if your manager does a clumsy job of delivering feedback (and a lot of them do), try to get past their delivery to the nuggets of helpful information.   It’s YOUR responsibility, after all, to build your skills and your career.

OH, and the same advice to you about breathing:  When you find your emotions rising up (anger, anxiety, defensiveness) remember to sit back, take a deep breathe, and let your body settle down before you continue.  And remember:  It may be personal, but that doesn’t mean you have to take it personally. 

I hope this is helpful for your discussions!