Practice Does Not Mean Perfect

I practice yoga.

I have to continually remind myself of that notion.  I PRACTICE yoga.  I continually strive to be better at it.  But sometimes, I forget about the “Practice” part, and I try too hard to be Perfect…which is how I’ve ended up with two yoga injuries six months apart.

How can something that is GOOD for me turn ugly?  Well, let me tell you, it ain’t easy.

My Yoga Story

My interest in yoga began eight years ago when my daughter, home on break, asked me to go with her to a Beginners Workshop on the other side of town.  I went, I got hooked.  Over time I have progressed from doing a few poses (or asanas) purely for the stretch value to now practicing intermediate yoga asanas to calm my mind, practice my breathing, and strengthen my ability to be fully present.

The whole point of yoga (which translates as “union”) is to help one connect body, mind, heart, and soul; and to accept and work with one’s limitations.  It is about acceptance.

Oh, and did I mention that when you practice yoga regularly it tones muscles, improves balance, dramatically increases core strength, and FEELS fabulous?  Yes, and that is where I get in trouble.

I REALLY like that physically fit thing.  So, when I do a downward dog, I REALLY do a down dog.  And the leg stretch in Warrior poses?  I have to stretch to the max, and do a PERFECT pose, like the guys in the pictures in Yoga Journal.  Which is how I injured my hips doing yoga last year… and why I now have shoulder problems.

Yes, I over-yoga’d.    Sigh.

Do you REALLY need to be Perfect?

Have you ever done something like that?  Gotten yourself so wrapped up in something you do that you just have to be PERFECT?  Hey, don’t deny it, you have.  It may not have been yoga.  Maybe it was soccer.  Or being the perfect spouse.  Or perfect parent.  or completing the P90X program – twice.  Or gardening to excess.  Or obssessing about fat/sugar/salt in your diet.  Or getting all As in school.  Or playing World of Warcraft.  Or being PERFECTLY Happy?

It’s not about the physical part, it’s about the conversation of needing/wanting to be perfect, to do it right, to follow it all the way to the end.

Be Perfect ABOUT your Practice

Exercising my body, in the end, is not about being perfect — it is about being fully present to the process what’s going on with me.  Being present means that I cannot come onto the yoga mat with an “agenda.” It can actually harm me to be too “determined,” about always getting it “right.” A better approach, I am reminded by one of my teachers, is to approach my yoga practice with equal parts patience and persistence, and to say, “I will do the best that I can, with what I have, today.”

And that is such a lovely approach to… well, just about everything: sports, school, parenting, marriage, diet, video games, and even happiness.  You’ll simply never get it perfect every time, but you CAN be perfect in your practice, always learning, always getting back up and trying again when you fall.

So, as I nurse my inflamed shoulder back to health, I have learned how to modify my down dog so I’m no longer hyperextending my shoulder.  I’m kinder to my hips when I stretch.  And I don’t expect myself to be happy ALL the time.

But I keep practicing!

Happiness is Standing On My Head

I finally did it!  After months of  practice and preparation, I finally managed to execute a full headstand!

OK, I could only hold it for a few seconds, but this was HUGE for me.  I’ve had to overcome my fear of falling as well as the “story” I told myself about how I “can’t” balance upside down.

Yoga = Union

Yoga demands a total IN the body awareness; in fact the word yoga means union — body, mind, soul.  I find that anytime I am feeling out of sorts –  physically, mentally, or emotionally — that 10 to 15 minutes of moving meditation (which is what yoga is, essentially) helps me recalibrate and get back in touch with my body and my mood.

To deepen my practice, I’ve studied different poses (asanas) and every few months try to add a new form or pose to my practice.  I’ve attempted — and mastered — just about every asana I’ve attempted EXCEPT in the category of Inversions.  Inversions are those poses that turn the body upside down.  While I mastered a shoulder stand (feet straight up in the air), I have struggled with everything else.

At the beginning of 2009 I set as a goal to master two new inversions this year.  I was determined.  (several of my friends and colleagues, upon hearing this goal, just rolled their eyes.  I push on, regardless!)

Where I’m Going ≠Where I Am

Then I attended a class where the woman next to me moved into several inversions with such grace and power that I was in awe.  After the class I asked her for a moment of assistance, and what she taught me completely changed my conversation.

I’d been so focused on the pose itself — the headstand, the handstand — that I was hardly paying any attention to the movement INTO the pose.  She showed me how to refocus my attention from where was going to where I am — to where my body is in the process of moving overhead.  This shifted my attention from my feet (trying to get them to a point six feet up the wall) to my core, where all the heavy lifting occurs.  When I brought myself back into my core, my middle, instead of “out there, ” I was able to easily move into headstand.  How cool!

The Key = Core Strength

This experience got me thinking about Happiness and the critical role of the core in creating and maintaining emotional stability.  When the focus of happiness is “out there,” one can be feeling OK about life during steady times.  But when life comes along and turns things upside down, it’s easy to fall down over and again.

Just as the physical core must be strong to hold a difficult yoga pose, our emotional core must be strong in order to hold steady when it gets turned in unusual ways.

I cannot emphasize enough the importance of practice, practice, practice in yoga.  At least four or five times a week I spend a few minutes moving my body through the basics (called Sun Salutations) to stretch and strengthen my arms, legs, core, and breath.

So too, one must practice, practice, practice the ability to hold calm in the body, the ability to bring oneself back to the center (the core) by attending to posture and a deep breath or two.  The strength we create thru practice shows up in times of challenge as resilience.

So keep working on that Happy Body of yours.  Stand tall, breathe deeply, smile often.  And the next time life turns you upside down, move into that pose with grace and know that you have the capacity to stand on your head AND be happy!

Happiness is standing on my head!